I dreaded the talk of guardianship when Anna was turning 18. It wasn’t because I was confused, it was another thing that we need to do as special needs mothers, the Warrior role. It was talked about almost incessantly at every IEP. Then again at other meetings with Anna’s social worker. Since Anna has a community health agency that gives us respite hours they check on all these pockets of information for her. So years ago, I had the agency help me with what the guardianship would look like and how to file the paperwork.
It ended up being on Zoom because it was 2023. We were in the land of COVID-19 so we were able to do this online. I was very excited NOT to go downtown for this.
Sitting in my dining room, I was the only biological parent on the call. I did not know this would be the case but it was. I believe the other parent of Anna was notified via mail. So at this hearing me and the biological father were named as co-guardians. I had the paperwork and I had to show it to all interested parties. This meant the school, doctors offices and her mental health agency.
Once, unknown to me it had lapsed as I was new to the process. So the first hearing was a temporary thing, which I somehow missed, or this is just how it goes at first and then you make it final. Again, somewhat vague at the time. I was so new to this I didn’t realize that there was an expiration date on it. The legal department of her mental health agency likely explained it, but never helped me to register for the guardianship to become permanent.
I had to provide this for a dental cleaning and since it was expired they made me wait three months until I got back to Zoom court. I had to possess this final non-expiring guardianship. I was upset but what could I do? When we went back to court we were awarded plenary guardianship. This means it never expires, yay!
But then years went by and no other biological parent came back in the picture. It’s not something that I understand. But it is something that I need to take seriously because Anna needs two people who are her guardians . This is just in case one of us is unable to be present for something she needs. This is where it comes in heavy.
Well, I am happy to announce that we have a new Co-Guardian. It is likely Anna’s second favorite person, her stepdad, Paul. We went to court on Tuesday March 11, 2025, at 8:15 am and we were able to move Paul to the spot he should have always been in. He has raised, cared for, cried about, gone out of his way, took great deals of time at appointments, checked on the the middle of the night, etc. In fact, when we met she was 5 and in my online profile I mentioned this: I have a special needs daughter that will be with me lifelong. If you are okay with this then we might connect, but it’s a big thing to consider. Paul never flinched and now he is better known as “Dad.”
So we have this finalized. What a good feeling this is. These are the best races in the Warrior Game.
But Warriors don’t stop there. I decided to make her sister, Gabrielle McCann, her standby guardian. This means if Paul or I were incapacitated she could take over for Anna. She could get her, house her, and make her decisions if both of us were not able to. No, it doesn’t mean this is permanent, it’s just until things could get sorted out. Grant, her brother, is always willing to help but being out of the country in the United States Air Force makes his availability a bit harder.
What a great week. What a fine accomplishment. Life is full of great people and I’m lucky to share the parenting of this miraculous girl named Anna with Paul, the new Co-Guardian.
