We had it all planned from the beginning. A Friday. A time that Anna would be in school. Her sister said, “Mom, I would love to have Anna there, but I’m not sure how we could include her. The bridal room is up two flights of stairs and the whole building is very un-accommodating for wheelchairs. I mean she can come if she wants but I think it will be so hard to include her.” I said, “Don’t worry, the wedding is at 12 noon, Anna will be at school.” This will work out perfectly for all.
Enter the talk of the snow day. It started with her bus driver on Tuesday. “The staff are all talking about the cold, you know, on Friday, we think there will be no school on Friday. It came out before I could even think, “Well I hope not, Gabrielle is getting married and we don’t want Anna there.” I stopped to soften my remark, and then I thought, “No, it’s the truth, it will be very hard to have her there. Her bus driver listened and cared, and most of all she understood.
We all know as Warriors that everything changes when we need to include them in events like this. The prep, the actual event, the afterward, all things change. I wanted this day to be without her. Let her be in school, let her “Do her thing and we will do ours.”
I did not get what I wanted or what the bride hoped for. The snow day was called and I was very annoyed. I tried to make the best of it in my head, but to be honest here I really was discouraged that we had to bring her on this day.
The entry was nuts, the air was negative six and we walked all around the beautiful 1917 building. I finally succumbed to pulling her backwards up 4 stone steps covered with snow. Thank goodness I was in winter boots and not dressed for the event yet. She stayed downstairs with Paul while we did our dressing and “readying” in the bridal room. She was there but she was like a guest that was not fully involved because, well, honestly how could she be? She was good all day with temperament, but did have some disturbance as we had to hear her rattle during the whole small ceremony. We should have had lots of Febreze in the small ceremony room because Anna had to be gassy that day, of course. We understood, our family is used to this trait of hers. I did sit there thinking, gosh I wonder if this lovely staff thinks she is in a dirty diaper. Nope, that’s just Anna and when she is gassy, well she isreally gassy. We just carried on like nothing was happening, again, what could we do??? She can’t be shoved in another room. This is why I did not want to have her there that day. The things that we cannot control, this is the anthem of the Warrior, the tune changes as the years roll by. I just thought at least she is happy, she is not crying.
We made the most of it, but truly this happens to our lives more than we would like. If I had tried to get a backup it would not have been worth it for just three hours. We we would have had to take her somewhere on top of primping and prepping. When you have to be somewhere at noon, like how much time do you want to push out of the day that starts at noon? We have just learned to lean into the hassle most of the time. Our family understands and the bride and groom certainly do, she is their family.
Our bride handled it the best. She never said a word about it. Since she now has a 17 month old daughter she understands more than ever the idea of motherhood. She got in a few pictures (we have yet to get the professional photos back) and we will have her in this event in our hearts (my angered heart) for all the years to come. And we continue to Warrior on in the events of life that include and exclude sometimes without much notice.
This was an elopement. Meant for six people, planned that way. Anna got to be lucky number 7. She makes her own path, always has.
And life moves on in the direction that the stars line up, even if I don’t like it.
Thank you for reading our Blog.
